Adventures in Non-Traditional Gardening

I am a plant murderer. Every living plant, flower, tree that comes into my care will, without a doubt, perish in an untimely way. Try as I might, and as much as I love live plants and flowers, I am just not destined to have a fully functioning garden. Mother says it comes with age, and trial-and-error. But think of all the plant lives I would take while I error…

I saw an article on Lifehacker about plants that can survive basically any form of neglect, black-thumb-ness, stupidity… Basically, these guys are indestructible. So I decided, as a final test of my complete inability to sustain floral life, to purchase some of these plants on Etsy and see if I could manage to kill the unkillable.

I received my plants earlier this week, and they are so cool!

These are airplants. They require no soil, as they get all the nutrients they need from the air. Watering is minimal, and they like cooler temperatures and filtered sunlight. They are hanging out in plastic cups right now, but I am going to get them a cool IKEA hangout to put them on my desk at work, where the filtered light is delectable.

I also couldn’t resist this little marimo moss ball! I think it is technically algae, as it lives in the bottom of lakes, which means no sunlight necessary to sustain this little guy. All he requires is a change of water every week or so, and some gentle rolling to maintain his shape. I named him Fuzzy.

This is the package my airplants came in! I love Etsy.

By the way, the shops I bought from are here and here. Support them! They are good people!

As I was unwrapping my little plants and explaining to Brady how I can’t manage to keep anything alive, he definitely had a concerned look on his face. But, as I explained to him…

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